The Letter
by somakeitcount
Summary: Bella goes to the hospital to visit Edward, who is fighting cancer. Can their love last through everything? As told by Bella Swan. All human. One-shot. Warning: Character death. In memory of a dear friend.


A/N: This story was written in memory of a friend of mine that lost his courageous battle with cancer last night. RIP bud. We're all going to miss you so much. We all loved you, more than any of us could have ever imagined we would. I know you're going to be watching out for us from now on; our guardian angel. Love now and forever, T.

Disclaimer: I do not own any portion of or ideas from Stephenie Meyer's books nor the quotes from Elizabeth Barrett Browning's poem,_ How do I love thee?_ All copyrighted quotes and characters belong to their rightful owners.

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**The Letter**

The hospital is the one place in the world that I hate the most. I'm familiar with it, but I hate it. I hate the way it smells. I hate the way it's so clean. I hate how everyone is so professional and barely shows any emotions. But mostly, I hate it because it's the place that isn't doing its job; they can't keep my Edward alive much longer.

I walked down the hallway, which was long and dark, as always. I pushed the door to his room open quietly, and peeked in. His room was a private one, thanks to his father's high position at the hospital. It was decorated with bright colours and flowers; Alice had said she wanted it to be a happy place for him, somewhere brighter than the rest of the gloomy hospital.

He was lying on the bed, eyes closed, hooked up to several machines and IV lines. We thought he had gone into remission two years ago, but the cancer had come back and had spread to his lungs. The doctors all said that there wasn't much left that they could do. We were hopeful that he would pull through, Edward most of all, but there are some things in this world that cannot be fought on even battle ground. Someone has to lose in the end.

Even as pale and gaunt as he was, Edward managed to look as attractive as always did. I walked over to his bed and took my place beside him. His gorgeous eyes fluttered open as my hand touched his cheek, and he flashed me one of his brilliant smiles. My heart pounded in my chest; he was the only man that could ever make my heart do that. "Hi, love," he said softly, grabbing my hand gently and kissing my fingertips.

"Hi there," I said, smiling weakly back. My eyes began to mist over immediately, and he clucked his tongue, imitating his mother, Esme.

"None of that, Bella. What's wrong?"

I closed my eyes, choking on the lump in my throat. I inhaled shakily as I shook my head. "Alice and Emmett told me what the doctors said. That you're going to..." My voice trailing off, not wanting to speak the words. I felt as though if I were to say the words, then he would be gone in an instant. I swallowed another lump in my throat and opened my eyes again. "Die..."

Edward's eyes closed now, and a small smile came onto his lips. I snorted at the action. What a paradox: the dying boy was smiling about his predicament. "I know... It's odd to think about. I wonder what comes after all of this, sometimes," he said, waving his hand around sluggishly. The action made me cringe inwardly, thinking about how much energy it took for him to put on this show for me.

He patted the bed and slid over on the mattress. Without another thought, I clambered onto the bed, tucking myself close to his body. He was always so warm. It was amazingly comforting. I pressed my lips to his cheek, his eyes closing. "You don't have to put on a show for me..." I whispered, tracing the outline of his lips. "If you're hurting, you don't have to hide it." Edward's eyes fluttered open and he grinned at me.

"I'm not putting on a show, Bella. Being around you makes me feel more alive than I do any other time." He pressed his lips to my forehead. "You're a much more effective drug than this morphine they've put me on. If you could be bottled, honestly, the seller would make millions."

I could not help but smile at him as I settled into his arms. My fingers traced the outline of his jaw, and I sighed. "I'm afraid, Edward. I can't live without you."

With more speed than I thought Edward could muster at this point, he turned on his side and looked at me sternly. He pointed his finger at me and frowned deeply. "Don't ever say that. You can live without me." His face softened, and his palm reached out to cup my face. "You're going to have to soon." My eyes began to mist over, and he smiled softly. "Don't start now, because then I'll start." I forced a small smile onto my lips, blinking back the tears.

"You're so beautiful, did you know that Bella? You are the only girl I have ever truly loved, and I promise you I will love you forever. Even when I'm gone, I'll be with you always."

"Always and forever? Those are some big promises, Mister Cullen," I said, leaning in to press my lips against his. I savoured the feeling, inhaling his scent.

"They're not all so big when you're in love, because by falling in love, you make those promises to that person." He smiled widely, settling back into the bed.

"I love you, Edward. Always and forever, more than you'll ever know. I'll never stop, never," I said, sniffing noisily.

"Nor will I ever stop loving you. I love you, Bella. Always and forever. And before I forget, there's a letter in the drawer for you. Don't forget to take it when you leave, promise?"

"I promise," I whispered, my eyes starting to droop. I yawned involuntarily, and Edward's hand smoothed my hair. I felt so complete, so content in his arms.

"Now sleep, my angel, my only love. I love you. Dream of sweet, happy things..."

"I love you, Edward. I love you..." And with that, I drifted into unconsciousness.

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I woke in the morning to the sound of a stifled scream and sobbing. My eyes fluttered open, and I was no longer by Edward's side. I was currently in a chair by his bed, and Esme was clinging to Rosalie at the end of Edward's bed. It was then that I noticed the squeal of Edward's heart monitor, and the horizontal line it was registering. "No..." I whispered, my eyes widening. "No, no no!" I choked out, flinging myself to his bed, clinging to his lifeless body. My Edward was gone.

"No, no, Edward, wake up!" I wailed over and over, my tears soaking the bed sheets. My hands roamed desperately for his, clinging to them when I found them. I kissed them over and over, sobbing violently. "No, please, come back, come back..." My sobs turned to agonized screams, and it was then that a pair of strong arms wrapped around me and tugged me away from my lover gently.

"Bella, shhh, it's alright..." came the deep voice of Emmett Cullen. His voice was thick with emotion, and when I glanced up at him, his eyes were brimming with tears. "It's alright..."

"He's gone..." I sobbed into Emmett's chest, clinging to him desperately. "He's gone... He's gone..."

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It was only an hour later that I was on my way back to the Cullen house with Alice and Emmett. I felt numb, as if I were in a nightmare, and I'd wake up at any moment. I only wished I could. I stared blankly out the window, my eyes red and swollen from the tears that were still falling. My lover was gone from this Earth. Never would I hold him again, kiss him again, see him again... Never.

As I fumbled in my purse for some tissues, I found the envelope that I had stuffed in my purse before we had left the hospital. With shaky hands, I opened it, a fresh wave of tears beginning as I stared at the paper. It was a letter in his perfect, beautiful handwriting, and a picture of the two of us together. I inhaled shakily, and began to read it to myself.

_My dearest Bella,_

_Although I wish that I was still with you, it was my time to leave this Earth. I will see you again one day, that much I promise you, in heaven, or whatever comes after this life. I want you to know that I will always love you, with every part of my being. I will never, ever leave you, no matter what kind of shenanigans you get yourself into (as if you are crazy enough to misbehave). I want you to go to school, and you should know that I have left all of my money and possessions to you. Go to school, get a degree, and live your life. Fall in love again, have children, watch your grandchildren grow up. Live, for you, for me, for us. I will see you again. I love you so much._

_I found a poem that I thought was very appropriate, and I wanted to share it with you. It's called __How do I love thee?__ by Elizabeth Barrett Browning. Remember this poem when you miss me._

_How do I love thee?_

_How do I love thee? Let me count the ways._

_I love thee to the depth and breadth and height_

_My soul can reach, when feeling out of sight_

_For the ends of being and ideal grace._

_I love thee to the level of every day's_

_Most quiet need, by sun and candle-light._

_I love thee freely, as men strive for right._

_I love thee purely, as they turn from praise._

_I love thee with the passion put to use_

_In my old griefs, and with my childhood's faith._

_I love thee with a love I seemed to lose_

_With my lost saints. I love thee with the breath,_

_Smiles, tears, of all my life; and, if God choose,_

_I shall but love thee better after death._

_-- Elizabeth Barrett Browning_

_I love you Isabella Marie Swan. Forever and always. Love, Edward Anthony Cullen._

Over and over I read this letter, until my vision was so blurry that I could no longer see straight. My heart ached so violently that I thought I might rip in two. I hugged the letter to my chest, looking out the window. At that moment, a strange wind blew in Forks, blowing a patch of clouds away and letting the sun shine on the small town. I sighed, soaking up the light and heat.

And suddenly, as if I had stepped out of the shadows, a weight lifted off my shoulders. He was alright, wherever he was. I was sure of it.

In that moment, I made the decision to keep my promise to Edward. I would live for myself, for him, for us. One way or another, I would survive. And I knew in my heart that he would be there to hold my hand every step of the way.


End file.
